The cost of the average wedding in America rose to $32,641 last year. But when it comes to what you can reasonably afford, I think it becomes relative to exactly how much debt you have and what kind of income we’re talking about.
If you have $5,000 in debt but you make $150,000 a year, stop worrying, pay off your debt, and save up for a great wedding. If you make $28,000 a year but you have $30,000 in debt, then you need to have a really minimal wedding. Anywhere from $3,000 to $5,000 would be reasonable in that kind of situation — and even then it’s going to be tight.
The more debt you have in relation to your income, the smaller your wedding expenses should be. A $32,000 wedding would be ridiculous for someone with a $28,000 income. But $28,000 is a below-average income, so you shouldn’t reasonably expect an average wedding in terms of cost. It really all boils down to ratios.
Just remember, the amount of money spent on the ceremony, reception and all that stuff isn’t what’s important. It’s the love that two people have for each other that makes the ceremony special and the marriage one that will last a lifetime!
Dear Dave: My mom is 95 years old, and she’s in amazing health. Financially speaking, she has about $150,000 in Certificates of Deposit, money market accounts, and savings bonds. Is there a better place she can invest her money? — Anonymous
Dear Anonymous: Certainly there are other investment vehicles that will make much more money than CD's, money markets and savings bonds. However, at your mom’s age people aren’t generally investing for the long haul, unless they’re investing it for their heirs.
If she’s comfortable with her finances, I’d suggest just leaving things alone. Don’t try to force her into something new. At her age she may still have bad memories of the Great Depression and a negative perception of the stock market. In a case like that, mutual funds might make her fearful. I wouldn’t take the chance of robbing a 95-year-old lady of her peace to try and do the “proper” thing with money.
However, if she’s agreeable to the idea of doing a little better with her money, you could start by moving a little into growth stock or balanced stock mutual funds. But do something like this only if the change won’t upset her and leave her fretting over her money. What we want for your mom is financial peace. — Dave
Your house is definitely an asset; it's the mortgage that's a liability. Some folks may try to position a house as a liability simply because it costs you money. But the truth is your home will make you more money than it will cost you over time. Therefore, it is an asset.
Some of the saddest situations I've seen in all my years of teaching are seniors who have paid-for homes and nothing saved or invested.
Money isn't the most important thing on earth, but it is a fact of life. That's why I encourage people to build an emergency fund of three to six months of expenses and begin saving for retirement before they tackle paying off their homes.
Dear Dave: I make $2,100 a month after taxes, and I have accumulated $46,000 in credit card debt. My husband makes more than I do, but he won't help me. He says I got myself into this mess, so it's my job to stop being irresponsible and fix it on my own. Do you have any advice? — Peggy
Dear Peggy: You've got a load of debt hanging over your head right now, but I think you've got bigger problems than that. You told me you're married, yet it sounds to me like you two are living entirely different and separate lives. This seems more like a roommate situation than a healthy, loving marriage.
I don't like your husband's attitude, but he does have a valid point in one respect. You were irresponsible with money, and now you've got a pile of debt on your hands. My big question is this: Where was he while all this was going on? Were you hiding it from him? And where was the communication and decision making, financial and otherwise, couples should engage in? Married people can't live this way and win in their relationship or with money.
The two of you desperately need to seek marriage counseling together. This relationship is on the rocks. You and your husband obviously have no trust or respect for each other, and there's a definite lack of communication, unity and shared goals. I don't know what happened to bring things to this point, but the preacher didn't pronounce you guys a joint venture when you got married; he said you were now one.
A little maturity, extra work and living on a simple budget will go a long way toward fixing most personal finance issues. But your marriage is in big trouble, Peggy. Please seek help!
